My Spring seminar schedule is insane. I have three seminars/conferences in six weeks. Sometimes I think my real business is attending seminars, with a little work sprinkled in between.

As of today’s writing, I’ve finished two seminars with one more to go.

So why do I do it?

Three reasons, really.

First, I go to learn. Good seminars keep you on the cutting edge of your business. Sure, you can follow along on the Internet, but some experts (I detest the word “guru”) reserve their best stuff for live events. Also, you can pick up some amazing tips and info from fellow attendees.

Second, I go for the networking. There is no substitute for face-to-face contact at live events. It’s how I meet future clients and potential joint venture (JV) partners. Along the way I’ve made friends, with whom I share leads and information.

Lastly, I go to meet the experts. Live events are often the only way to get on an expert’s radar. And the best events encourage mixing between attendees and the luminaries in your field.

That’s the topic of this post—how to properly engage an expert at an event.

Yes, there are definitely right and wrong ways to do it. And I witnessed both over the past several weeks.

I’ll start with the wrong way first.

At Ken McCarthy’s System Seminar in Chicago (April 27-29) we had a networking session on Friday evening, after the seminar opening assembly.

Most of the speakers for the weekend were present at the session, including John Carlton, “the most ripped off copywriter on the Web.” John’s one of the top copywriters working today and an amazing teacher of copywriting and marketing.

Which makes him a target at live events. I know John, so I’m aware that he hates being cornered by overly enthusiastic fans who want to pick his brain.

And that’s exactly what happened.

Three of us clustered around John, talking with him. I like listening to John talk, so I stood to the side and mostly observed, occasionally interjecting a comment when appropriate.

But one young man who had an online store decided he really wanted John’s advice on how to increase his sales. So he hammered John with one question after another, not catching on when John’s body language broadcasted that he had had enough.

Finally, in exasperation, John pointed to me and told the young man, “Ask Karl, he can answer all your questions,” and promptly made his escape.

With John gone, the kid turned to me and continued his barrage of questions.

So what did the kid do wrong?

Two big mistakes: One, he forgot about networking rule #1, which is to always make the interaction about the other person, not you and your problems. Two, he was hunting for free help.

When you meet a person for the first time (experts included) and want them to enjoy talking with you, always give them permission to talk about themselves and their interests.

Experts are people, too, not information machines. They get tired from traveling and many become psychically exhausted from the rigors of teaching and presenting—from being “on” constantly.

If you make an effort to keep your conversation pleasant for them, they’re more likely to talk with you longer.

Always remember to let them go if they show signs of wanting to end the conversation and move on. And never shove your business card at them unless they ask for one.

The second mistake the kid made was assuming he had the right to demand free marketing help from John.

John Carlton charges $1250 for a one-hour phone consultation. And for a business ready to take advantage of his expertise, it’s like buying $100 bills for less than buck a piece.

But this kid wanted John to solve all his business and marketing problems for free, right there during the networking session!

Keep that in mind next time you want to pump an expert for information.

At my second seminar of the Spring season, Covert Communications (a learning event hosted by Harlan Kilstein and Dr. Chris Tomasulo on May 19 & 20), I participated in a textbook-perfect interaction with an expert.

The expert was Parris Lampropolis, an A-list copywriter who has written for most (if not all) of the major direct mail publishers, like Agora, Boardroom, Rodale, Philips, etc.

The place: The bar in the Platinum Hotel and Spa. For those who don’t know, the hotel bar is the networking hotspot of any live event. Even if you don’t drink, stick a club soda in your hand and mingle. It’s often worth the price of the event all by itself.

One of my friends, copywriter and women’s marketing authority Leah Carson, walked over and sat down at the table I shared with Parris and a few other copywriters.

Rather than launch into what she was doing and hit up Parris for his copywriting overflow, Leah asked Paris how he broke into writing for the big publishers.

Parris then proceeded to tell us his war stories and share tips about working with these high-end clients. Fascinating stuff, and he clearly enjoyed talking about his early experience in the business.

Over the next few nights of the event, we developed a relationship with Parris (as well as with other luminaries like copywriter David Deutch and persuasion expert Kenrick Cleveland).

The key was treat them with respect.

And do you want to know another secret about successful networking at seminars?

Treat the newbies you meet with respect, too. Aside from practicing good karma, you’d be amazed who and what a newbie might know.

And you never know which newbie might become the next expert.

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